Five ways you can support your child through their exams

Richard Girvan, Principal, Stephen Perse Cambridge

The exam season each summer represents more than just a series of papers to be sat. For young people in Years 11 and 13, it is a significant threshold moment: a culmination of years of learning and personal growth, and for many, their first real experience of public academic testing. It can bring a quiet sense of anticipation—or at times, an anxious pressure to perform.

As educators and parents, our task is to help young people navigate this period with perspective and steadiness. That means supporting not only their academic success but their confidence and wellbeing. At Stephen Perse Cambridge, we speak often of the whole child—and this philosophy is never more important than at times like these.

Here are five ways in which you can help your child feel both prepared and supported in the coming weeks.

 1. Shape a space that supports focus and recovery

The right environment plays a subtle but important role in helping students manage their learning. If it’s possible, try to help your child create a study space that is separate from where they sleep or relax—whether that’s at home, in a library, or a designated workspace at school. This physical separation signals to the brain that there is a time to work, and a time to rest. More than just neatness, it’s about enabling a rhythm: a sense that revision can be entered into deliberately and stepped away from consciously, with time to recharge.

2. Nurture confidence gently, with reflection and care

True confidence is not something we give to our children—it is something they discover in themselves, often in quiet, unglamorous moments of perseverance. We can help by reminding them, gently and often, of the progress they’ve already made. At school, we share stories of individuals who faced obstacles and kept going—not as tales of heroism, but to normalise the role of effort, missteps, and learning from experience.

At home, focus on affirming the habits they’re building, rather than the outcomes they’re chasing. Remind them that exams test not who they are, but what they know at a moment in time. Reframing challenges as part of the process—not evidence of inadequacy—can be a powerful foundation for resilience.

3. Encourage balance and renewal

While revision is important, so too are the spaces in between. Students do not thrive on intensity alone. Help them maintain the parts of life that bring joy, connection, and restoration—whether that’s music, movement, a creative hobby, or simply time with friends. These are not distractions, but vital sources of energy and perspective. We tell our students that maintaining these rhythms isn’t indulgent; it’s wise. Performance is sustained not by relentless study, though inevitably there will be an increase in study time as exams approach, but by a life that still feels whole.

4. Offer presence, not pressure

Your presence during this season may matter more than your advice. There is something quietly affirming about being available, being interested, and showing that you care without demanding. One simple strategy is to become the learner—ask your child to explain a topic or concept to you. This deepens their understanding, and communicates trust: that you believe in their growing mastery.

At school, our teachers offer additional revision sessions and stay open to questions by email. If your child’s school offers similar support, encourage them to use it—and don’t hesitate to make contact yourself if you think a gentle nudge might help.

5. Begin the day with calm and care

The start of an exam day can carry its own weight. Creating a steady morning routine—breakfast, preparation, and a sense of not being rushed—can help a young person feel anchored. Avoid the temptation to encourage last-minute cramming. If they want to check something, let them—but keep the tone light. Your role is to offer composure and reassurance, not intensity. A calm morning can set the tone not just for that exam, but for how they carry themselves through the rest of the day.

A deeper understanding of resilience

We often think of resilience as grit—the ability to keep going under pressure. And that matters. But in my experience, resilience also comes from something gentler: the ability to find meaning, comfort and encouragement in the world around us. It comes from strong friendships, trusted adults, restorative routines, and the small joys that keep us grounded when challenge arises. At its best, education builds these deeper reserves—not by avoiding pressure, but by ensuring young people are supported, connected, and believed in.

And when the final exam is over, what will endure isn’t just the grade or the subject knowledge. It’s also the character a student has developed, the confidence they’ve earned, and the sense that they are capable of rising to challenges while remaining true to themselves.

Examinations are important, yes—but they are not definitive. They are moments in time, not final verdicts. With your support, your child can come through this season with more than results. They can emerge with a deeper sense of who they are becoming—and that is perhaps the most valuable outcome of all.